F4S: Hey Grandkids (and others), get a hold of God's wisdom in His Son real early. Do so before you hurt or maim yourself with bad decisions. Do so before you end up marrying wrong, or deeply hurting another, or crippling your own children.

Monday, January 5, 2026

Hey Grandkids (and others), get a hold of God's wisdom in His Son real early. Do so before you hurt or maim yourself with bad decisions. Do so before you end up marrying wrong, or deeply hurting another, or crippling your own children.

Dating, or movin' in with while single (that's stupid, go look at the statistics on what typically happens), or marrying someone outside of the will of God.. has a huge price tag that you really don't want to pay. Listen up, no matter how outwardly attractive that guy or girl may be, go do God's will instead.

Relationships matter. Pray about those a whole lot.. if it concerns you a lot, pray a lot, and do God's will. If you are called to be married one day, don't seek a spouse, or be lazy. Pray for them now. Allow God to add unto your life in His good timing. 

A woman’s heart should be so lost in God (I mean saved and sold-out to Christ--all in at church too), that a man must really seek Him first, in order to find her.

Same for you guys, don't get distracted away from your first-love relationship. If she doesn't love God more than you, then don't waste your time with her. No time for idols, and no excuses.

"But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." Matthew 6:33 esv

"Sin will keep you longer than you want to stay. it will cost you more than you want to pay and it'll take you further than you want to go" ~ Adrian Rogers

Sin will literally cost you far more than you want to pay. Think of the tens of thousands of dollars in this nation alone, given away to lawyers to get a really bad marriage behind those who date, move in, and or marry foolishly. 

Fully trust the Lord and his word. How much have you prayed about it? Don't trust faulty matchmaking dating sites. The singles I work with say some are better than others for single believers (eHarmony any better.. not sure? Be careful with all of them even if they say they are a real Christian). Yes, take your sweet time to see what their character is really like. Trust God for discernment and guidance -- He is the ultimate matchmaker. Pray, don't seek a spouse. Don't do nothing passively. Seek first the Lord and His will, go get some fellowship at a healthy Bible-teaching church. Grow in grace and in the truth. 

Why get catfished and duped over and over again from the same sites? 

Q: Do you have parents or a brokenhearted parent that's screwed up in this area, I mean moving in with an ungodly person, or into a prayerless Bible free marriage perhaps? Choose early not to make their same inferior romance choice and inherit an empty lonely joyless life (filled up with widgets, toys, devices, loveless misery) minus having Jesus as Lord. Why inherit their empty life of guilt minus any true repentance?

Think about all the crimes, domestic fights, and fatherless homes related to somply hooking up wrong. Cults will separate you from your family quickly? Why hook up with someone like that working behind the scenes so they won't up here culpable?
Take heed to the sober warnings of authoritative Scripture inspired by the Holy Spirit who cares about you.. for your sake for your family's sake.
“Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?”
— 2 Corinthians 6:14 (nkjv). Blog 2 on this (CLICK).

Do you have DILs or SILs or FILs or MILs who try to separate you from your own family, or block and hinder you from being a bright shining light for Jesus? I am so sorry! God understands. 


Right friendship in..Dating? It should always be based on godly friendship. 



Is it good to have close friendships with unbelievers? I have friends who are lost. Jesus did too. 

When single, I didn't date or have real close friendships with lost sinners or carnal believers, or with religious or worldly people. 






I. BELIEVERS WHO CHOSE THE WRONG CLOSE FRIENDS OR COMPANIONS PAY A PRICE

1. Samson – Intimacy Without Discernment

Text: Judges 14–16
Samson repeatedly yoked his heart to those who did not fear the Lord—Philistine women who ultimately betrayed him.

“Get her for me, for she is right in my eyes.” (Judges 14:3)

Result: Loss of strength, calling, freedom, and vision.

“He did not know that the LORD had departed from him.” (Judges 16:20)

Principle: Emotional desire without spiritual alignment destroys spiritual power.


2. Rehoboam – Listening to Foolish Friends

Text: 1 Kings 12:6–16
Rehoboam rejected wise counsel and embraced peers who fed his pride.

“He forsook the counsel of the elders… and consulted the young men.” (1 Kings 12:8)

Result: The kingdom was divided.

“Where there is no guidance, a people falls.” (Proverbs 11:14)


3. Amnon – Corrupted by a Wicked Friend

Text: 2 Samuel 13
Jonadab gave Amnon clever but evil counsel, leading to sexual sin and death.

“Jonadab was a very crafty man.” (2 Samuel 13:3)

Result: Rape, murder, family destruction, national shame.

“Bad company corrupts good morals.” (1 Corinthians 15:33)


4. Jehoshaphat – Unequal Alliances

Text: 2 Chronicles 18–20
A godly king who allied himself with wicked Ahab.

“Should you help the wicked and love those who hate the LORD?” (2 Chronicles 19:2)

Result: Near death and divine rebuke.


II. BELIEVERS UNEQUALLY YOKED IN MARRIAGE

5. Solomon – Love That Turned His Heart

Text: 1 Kings 11:1–8
Solomon loved many foreign women who drew his heart away from God.

“His wives turned away his heart.” (1 Kings 11:3)

Result: Idolatry, divided heart, judgment on the kingdom.

“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” (Matthew 6:21)


6. Ahab – Married to Jezebel

Text: 1 Kings 16–21
Ahab was weak; Jezebel was openly evil and spiritually aggressive.

“Jezebel his wife incited him.” (1 Kings 21:25)

Result: National idolatry, persecution of prophets, divine judgment.

“Evil companionships deform good morals.” — Clement of Alexandria


7. Jehoram (Son of Jehoshaphat) – Corrupted Through Marriage

Text: 2 Kings 8:16–19
He married Ahab’s daughter and adopted Ahab’s ways.

“He walked in the way of the kings of Israel.” (2 Kings 8:18)

Result: Spiritual collapse, family slaughter, painful death.


8. Ezra & Nehemiah’s Generation – Marriages That Diluted Faith

Text: Ezra 9–10; Nehemiah 13:23–27

“The holy seed has mixed itself with the peoples of the lands.” (Ezra 9:2)

Result: Loss of biblical language, diluted worship, generational compromise.

“Their children could not speak the language of Judah.” (Nehemiah 13:24)


III. BELIEVERS AFFECTED BY UNGODLY ASSOCIATES

9. Lot – Righteous, Yet Poorly Positioned

Text: Genesis 13; 19

“Lot chose for himself all the valley of the Jordan.” (Genesis 13:11)

Though righteous (2 Peter 2:7–8), Lot surrounded himself with corruption.

Result: Loss of family, moral confusion, generational damage.


10. Peter – Fearful of the Wrong Crowd

Text: Galatians 2:11–14

“Peter drew back and separated himself.” (Galatians 2:12)

Result: Hypocrisy that misled others.

“The fear of man lays a snare.” (Proverbs 29:25)


IV. CORE SCRIPTURES ON UNEQUAL YOKING

“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers.”
(2 Corinthians 6:14)

“Can two walk together unless they are agreed?” (Amos 3:3)

“He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” (Proverbs 13:20)

“A little leaven leavens the whole lump.” (Galatians 5:9)


V. GREAT CHRISTIAN QUOTES

“Show me your friends, and I will show you your future.”
— John Maxwell

“If you choose the wrong companions, you will live the wrong life.”
— A.W. Tozer

“Marriage either draws you closer to God or slowly pulls you away.”
— Tim Keller

“Compromise always begins in the heart before it ever shows in behavior.”
— Charles Spurgeon

“The first step to apostasy is rarely doctrinal—it is relational.”
— Francis Schaeffer


VI. REDEMPTIVE BALANCE (IMPORTANT PASTORAL NOTE)

Scripture does not teach isolation, but discernment.

“I wrote to you not to associate with sexually immoral people—not at all meaning the people of this world.” (1 Corinthians 5:9–10)

Jesus ate with sinners, but never yoked His direction to them.


SUMMARY TEACHING STATEMENT

God may redeem the unequally yoked, but He never recommends the yoke.
Every biblical example shows that when hearts are joined without shared reverence for God, the stronger spirit must pull the weaker—or the weaker will slowly reshape the stronger.

If you’d like, I can next:
• Turn this into a sermon manuscript
• Create a small-group discussion guide
• Add statistics on marriage outcomes & faith drift
• Or write a pastoral counseling version for those already unequally yoked

Just say the word.

You said:
Yes into a pity, to the point sermon
ChatGPT said:

Kurt — here is a tight, pithy, to-the-point sermon you can deliver in under 20 minutes, or expand if needed. It’s clean, pastoral, and piercing without being harsh.


SERMON TITLE

“Who’s Pulling the Yoke?”

Primary Text

“Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers.”
— 2 Corinthians 6:14


INTRO (60 seconds)

God never warns us because He wants to restrict us — He warns us because He loves us.
A yoke determines direction, pace, and destination. If you yoke your life to the wrong person, the wrong voice, or the wrong influence, you may still love God — but you will be pulled away from His will.

“Can two walk together, unless they are agreed?” (Amos 3:3)


POINT 1 — WRONG RELATIONSHIPS DULL SPIRITUAL DISCERNMENT

Samson loved God’s calling but ignored God’s wisdom.

“She is right in my eyes.” (Judges 14:3)

Desire replaced discernment.
At the end, the most tragic verse:

“He did not know that the LORD had departed from him.” (Judges 16:20)

Truth: You don’t lose God overnight — you drift relationally first.

“Bad company corrupts good morals.” (1 Corinthians 15:33)


POINT 2 — UNEQUAL YOKES STEER GODLY PEOPLE OFF COURSE

Solomon loved the Lord — and loved the wrong women.

“His wives turned away his heart.” (1 Kings 11:3)

Not his theology — his attachments ruined him.

“The heart is led long before the feet follow.”
— Charles Spurgeon


POINT 3 — FRIENDS CAN DIVIDE WHAT GOD BUILDS

Rehoboam listened to the wrong voices.

“He forsook the counsel of the elders.” (1 Kings 12:8)

One bad circle split a kingdom.

“He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” (Proverbs 13:20)

You don’t need enemies when you have unwise friends.


POINT 4 — GODLY PEOPLE CAN BE DAMAGED BY UNGODLY PROXIMITY

Lot was righteous — but badly positioned.

“Lot chose for himself…” (Genesis 13:11)

Righteous heart. Wrong neighborhood.
The cost?
• Loss of family
• Moral confusion
• Generational damage

“Righteousness without wisdom still bleeds.”
— A.W. Tozer (paraphrased)


POINT 5 — GOD DOES NOT CALL US TO ISOLATION, BUT TO DIRECTION

Jesus ate with sinners — He was never led by them.

“I do not ask that You take them out of the world.” (John 17:15)

We are called to influence, not entanglement.

“Marriage, friendship, and counsel either pull you closer to Christ — or quietly away.”
— Tim Keller

It's crazy to ignore God's warnings in the word. Sin makes people stupid. 

God may redeem an unequal yoke —
but He never recommends one.

Ask yourself:
• Who has my ear?
• Who has my heart?
• Who shapes my thinking when life gets hard?

“Above all else, guard your heart.” (Proverbs 4:23)

Because the yoke you choose today
determines the road you walk tomorrow.


I say this...

Choose relationships that edify you in Bible truth with Grace and pull you toward Christ, not away from Him, not away from healthy churches that worship Him and spirit and in truth.

If you are a real Christian, choose not to date or marry anyone who is not a growing, reborn Christian who loves Jesus more than they love you. 

Want a list of marriages where people married outside God’s will to learn from that?


Biblical Examples of Ungodly or Out-of-God’s-Will Marriages

1. Esau – Married Canaanite/Hittite Women

  • Reference: Genesis 26:34–35; 28:6–9

  • What happened: Esau married Hittite/Canaanite women; this brought grief to his parents (Rebekah and Isaac).

  • Consequence: Spiritual conflict and family irritation traceable to interfaith/cultural disregard.


2. Israelite Men with Moabite/Amonite/Other Foreign Wives (Exodus from Covenant)

  • Reference: Numbers 25; Ezra 9–10

  • What happened: Many Israelite men married foreign wives who worshiped pagan gods.

  • Consequence: God’s anger burned; Ezra called people to repentance and divorce those foreign wives to restore covenant faithfulness.


3. King Solomon – Foreign Wives and Idolatry

  • Reference: 1 Kings 11:1–8

  • What happened: Solomon loved many foreign wives and concubines who turned his heart to other gods.

  • Consequence: God told him the kingdom would be divided after his reign—judgment directly tied to idolatrous influences via marriage.Bible Hub


4. Samson – Philistine Woman / Delilah

  • Reference: Judges 14; Judges 16

  • What happened: Samson married a Philistine woman (outside Israel), repeatedly engaged with Philistine women including Delilah.

  • Consequence: Betrayal, capture, eventual death with the Philistines. Even though he killed many enemies at the end, the narrative links his downfall to those relationships.


5. Ahab and Jezebel

  • Reference: 1 Kings 16:31–33; 21

  • What happened: King Ahab married Jezebel, a Phoenician princess who worshiped Baal.

  • Consequence: Her influence led Israel into idolatry, persecution of prophets, and moral decline.


6. Herod Antipas and Herodias (Divorced and Married Illegally)

  • Reference: Mark 6:17–18

  • What happened: Herod divorced his wife to marry his brother’s wife (Herodias).

  • Consequence: John the Baptist condemned the marriage and was executed because of this dispute.


Note on Ruth & Boaz, Joseph & Asenath, Timothy’s Father

  • Ruth & Boaz are not condemned at all—Ruth is a God-fearing Moabitess who becomes part of the messianic line, illustrating God’s grace even beyond ethnic boundaries. Similarly, Moses’ Ethiopian wife (there's no biblical rebuke f0r them) and Joseph’s Egyptian bride aren’t portrayed as spiritual failures at all. 


Christian Teaching on Marrying Outside the Faith

New Testament Teaching

  • Believers are warned:

    “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers…” — 2 Corinthians 6:14 (cf. Deut. 7:3–4).
    This extends to marriage and close life partnerships.

  • Paul’s pastoral guidance:
    If a believer is already married to an unbeliever who consents to live with them, Paul says they shouldn’t divorce because the believer’s faith may sanctify the household (1 Cor. 7:12–14), though this is not an endorsement of marrying an unbeliever in the first place.


Current Modern Statistics on Inter-Faith/Unbeliever Marriages

United States Trends

  • So called.. Inter-faith marriages among those married since 2010:

    • ~39% are with a spouse of a different faith.

    • ~18% are between a Christian and a religiously unaffiliated partner.Pew Research Center

* Broader Research

  • Some sociological data suggests over 50% of marriages now cross faith lines in Western societies, though not all involve unbelievers per se.


Christian Reflections & Quotes

* On Unequal Yoking

“What do righteousness and wickedness have in common? ..What fellowship can light have with darkness?” — 2 Corinthians 6:14 (Bible)

* From Christian Teachers

Be forewarned that such unions with the lost and carnal people.. lead to a compromised faith, to spiritual conflict, and testimony damage, because marriage should deeply shape spiritual life together in Christ. The closer two individuals grow and get to God, the closer they will be together. 

Never allow anyone, no matter who they are, to influence you away from Christ, His church, or the gospel.

Don't allow false teachers into your home, and don't block those who live far from their pattern in Christ. Have you been mocked, jerred or persecuted for simply walking with Christ? I'm sorry about that. Forgive them and move on with the gospel. 

In the workplace or at home, I wait on the right timing and stay ready to share. We are to be always ready in walking with Jesus with an answer for the hope that is within us (1 Peter 3:15)... but we must do so with gentleness and respect, relying upon the Holy Spirit’s power and guidance. Yes, following His lead. 

When cultists or false teachers knock at the door or confront us anywhere, this could be an opportunity to gently but boldly relate the truth about Jesus to them, or it could be an opportunity to “leave them; they are blind guides” (Matthew 15:14). In any case, we must be studied up, prayed up (pray without ceasing for all kinds of people). We must rely on the Lord’s wisdom not worldly wisdom (James 1:5), and be very cautious so as not to cast our pearls before spiritual pigs and spiritual dogs who are not open to the truth (See Matthew 7:6).

Parents and grandparents want to hear what God has to say about influencing people towards the Lord, or away from Him (Click here, open your Bible, and start to prayerfully study. See the full context with these verses)?

What impact did Domitian have on Christian history?

Who was Tertullian?


Biblical Ungodly/Out-of-God’s-Will Marriages

Person/UnionUngodly/Unbelieving Spouse?Consequence
EsauCanaanite/Hittite wivesGrieved parents; spiritual legacy tension
Israelite men (Exodus/Numbers)Pagan wivesGod’s anger, covenant violation
SolomonMany foreign wivesIdolatry, kingdom divided
SamsonPhilistine woman(s)Betrayal, personal downfall
Ahab + JezebelIdolatrous princessNational idolatry/persecution
Herod Antipas + HerodiasLaw-breaking unionJohn the Baptist executed

You choose. You can choose Christ early and learn the easy way by taking heed to God's word and Spirit where you can learn the hard way by doing things your own way. How you feel like doing. Some people never learn and go from one train wreck to the next.